19 out of 10

20 Jan, I had a bad day. I was soo pissed off. At work (Nandos) and at home too. Not to mention that lately my Bro hasn't been spending 'his' time in the house/home. Everyone can ignore me, but not my family. I know, maybe I am selfish (please do give comment about this, readers!). HHmm..Maybe I am too conservative or not a 'cool' sister to him. I always have this expectation that we would at least spend time in a day for a dinner, I hope so. Maybe, I enherit this from home. Back in Indo, the only time where everyone, the 5 of us (Mum, Dad, Me, Sis and Bro) can sit and catch up after long busy day is Dinner time. So..everyone is expected to show up. Unless, there is other 'noticed' committments. So, I do expect my Bro to do the same 'tradition' here, in Melb, while we are still living in the same house, I suppose. But, maybe it's just my 'over-demanding' expectation to him. At least, if he is not going to have dinner, please do inform me with his own consciousness...not when I call and ask if he is coming home for dinner (almost everyday). HHmm..Deep in me, I only need a 1 hour dinner time to spend with him..That's all. The good thing is, Today, I didn't wait for him. I cook. And I cook for myself..not for him. They(my Bro and Jackson, my housemate) can eat the meal later, when they are hungry (coz I always cook a junk of meal)...Anyway, I am trying to NOT make this 'not eating dinner at home' issue as an issue. Coz I am trying to compromise.

Anyway, about that Saturday..I had a bad shift at work. But Lucky, someone called me that day (from far far away)..and it just made my day again. Xie xie =) Anyway, I guess, sometimes people like to take me for granted. And I hate knowing that. I am not angel. I do mistakes too. But I wish, people are not that cynical about this. And some friends just keep hurting me though I have tried many times to make it up to them. I guess, I just have to think that, they are not those friends that I can count on. They don't appreciate me, and can't be there for my goods and bads. So..I will just let it be. Currently, I love my part time job, coz I feel secure. But if I find a better job, I will definitely go for it. Don't really care about the pay, coz I need Experiences more than anything..don't I?

These days, I pretty much still in holiday. It's kinda boring. I wish I could have enrolled in any of the summer courses, or short courses. Coz I feel soooooooooo 'guilty' waking up late every morning. I need something to look forward to each day. Something that can triggers me to wake up 'on time' each morning..Or should I just enjoy this time till I start UNi again next month. Coz once it starts, life won't be that 'easy' no more. No more relaxing weeks for catch up or do random things.

So far, 4 pcmsg, 3 phcl.
And it's now 19 out of 10.

:June